Wednesday, June 25, 2008

UNBELIEVABLE NEWS!!

I have such incredible news to share, I can't even believe it myself. I had my molds done at the orthodontist's office the other day. Yesterday, at 4:45 I received a call from the Ortho's office saying that Dr. Post had to meet with me before I left for vacation. I immediately felt the anxiety creeping in. We were originally going to schedule something for today but, after telling her I was feeling a little anxious about this meeting, she said I could come in for 5:15. So off we went.
Dr. Post said that he had really studied my molds that afternoon and felt very strongly that with a little patience and the correct tweaking with elastics, he feels he can accomplish what we set out to do without the second surgery. I can't even believe I am writing this!! I knew my bite had really been coming together but, I never ever expected this news. I am so incredibly relieved. It hasn't really even hit me yet. I still can't believe it. Dr. Post laughed and said that I should tell my blog friends that we had something telepathically going on. I had been worried about the surgery and that had been thinking about how to correct it without the surgery. He actually said that over the last few months he had been wondering in the back of his head what or if he could do this without surgery. It seems like every month the open bite just got smaller and smaller with each adjustment. He says the SARPE wasn't even a question but, just that has made a big difference in my bite.

NOW, I just need to get my head around all of this new news and RELAX!! Relieved doesn't even begin to tell you how I feel right now!!

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Help!!!

Alright, I'm obsessing. I can't get it off my mind. It's consuming my every thought. I'm nervous. I remember very well how much pain I was in after the SARPE. I also know he'll be doing more this time. Just the thought of him screwing plates into my jaw and then wiring me shut, makes me sick. I feel like such a wimp. I want it done, I just don't want to go through all the pain and starvation to get there.
I had my cardiology appointment last Monday. I asked him how he recommended me taking my heart medication while I am wired. He says, "are you really going to be wired, like tightly wired?" Ah, yes! So, after thinking about it he would like me to try and fit it in the space behind my molars. If I need to cut it in half, that's okay too. I'm worried that trying to shove my fingers back there to slide a pill in after my jaw was just sawed, might not feel so good. I will ask but, I am sure my regular doctor will say the same thing about my thyroid medication and my birth control. Has anyone else had any experience with this??

I want my vacation to come quickly, I need the relaxing time at the ocean with my family BUT, I am not ready for surgery. Mentally, I just don't feel there yet. It's funny, if someone asked me a month ago, I would have said lets get it done as soon as possible. Now, with 3 weeks left, I feel sick.
I don't even know where this is coming from. I actually started this post back on the 11th and haven't been able to finish and post it.

This is so hard for me to write but, I feel like I'm going crazy. I feel like every ache and pain I have must be something bad. I actually had a colonoscopy yesterday and the doctor took some biopsies. My mind has wandered off believing I must have something horrible. I feel like I need the results immediately. Has anyone ever felt so anxious about something, you find it hard to even concentrate?

I keep telling myself to relax and to breath but, I'm finding it very difficult. I haven't even been viewing my blog for fear of the inevitable.

What on earth is wrong with me? What I would give to be 6… 8 weeks post op. Help!!

Friday, June 6, 2008

Brave???

My Uncle commented to me last night that I was so brave for going ahead with this surgery. It seemed strange to me because, I certainly don't feel brave. I feel nervous. I feel like, I wish I didn't have to do it. I sat there really thinking about it. I feel like I don't really have a choice. If I want a normal bite, I have to do it. I know he meant it in the nicest way BUT, sometimes I wish people would understand that it's not just a quick decision I made so that I would look better. I would just like to be able to breath and chew like your average normal person.

34 more days.... yikes!!

Have a great weekend everyone!!

Monday, June 2, 2008

Next month...can you believe it!!!

I can officially say, my surgery is next month.
Part of me can't wait and the other part of me doesn't want it to come. You know that feeling in the pit of your stomach that you get when something big is about to happen….that's what I have going on. I'm feeling a little anxious. My youngest daughter, Kate, got a little teary eyed last night when we talked about me staying overnight in the hospital. My husband and I were talking about how poorly Holly was treated while she was there and I said, that he had better not leave me, because I don't want to go through that. So Kate asks, "if he stays with you, where will I go?" Poor thing. I told her that I would be fine and that Daddy and Grandma would make sure that one of them was always with her.


I started picking up a few things at the grocery store this weekend. I wanted to make sure I had plenty of broth in the house, to mix things with so they can go through the Zip & Squeeze bags. I got a couple of soups. I actually searched the web and came up with a few different pureed soup recipes that I would like to try so I can freeze in single portions, so that all we have to do is zap it in the microwave and pour it in the bags. Viola….dinner. Seems weird to be cooking soups this time of year. I guess a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do=)

Between softball games, a baby shower, graduation, birthdays and vacation this month, along with all of my appointments, I think it is going to fly by. I feel like I am so booked up. My girlfriends and I are trying to set up a small BBQ before I go in for surgery and it just doesn't seem to be happening.

Anyway, I hope Holly, Heather and Leah are all feeling great and back to normal in no time!! My thoughts are with all of you!!

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Here's the lastest

I'm feeling a little emotional today. I just feel the need to tell you all once again how amazing you are! Just when I need a boost, you all seem to come and say just the right things! Thank you!!
Does anyone ever wonder if we'll ever meet? So many of you have made such an incredible impact on my life, that I wonder sometimes if I'll ever come face to face with any of you. Hmmm… I hope so!!

Now on to Ortho. news:

I had a regular adjustment this morning. My teeth are already hurting so, whatever he did… it's working!
I told him about my thoughts on scheduling the upcoming appointments. We were both pretty much on the same page so, that made me feel better. As more and more gets scheduled, I get a little more excited and also a little more anxious. You know, the surgery part doesn't bother me at all. It's still that whole wired shut thing I can't seem to get off my mind. Breath……..

So my appointments look like this:

June 16: Blood work (lab appt.)
June 17: Surgical Molds
June 20: EKG and Pre-Op Physical
June 28 - July 5th: VACATION
July 7: Pre-Op Hospital Interview
July 9: Surgical Spurs placed
July 10: Appt. with Dr. Weldon (OS) He wanted to see me after he received the molds and after the surgical spurs were placed.
July 11: Surgery

I am thinking that with all of these appointments and with everything else I have going on, (my daughter plays softball and with the school year coming to an end) I'll bet time is going to fly by.

I'll have to post some new pics, I decided to go with the hot pink ligs today!!

I'm looking forward to a nice long 3 day weekend. My husband took the whole weekend off. We haven't had a weekend off together in a very long time. Between his work and mine, we wake up to an alarm clock 7 days a week. Not this weekend!!!!

I hope you all enjoy your weekend too!!

Monday, May 19, 2008

Another adjustment and a little self doubt

I have another adjustment tomorrow morning. I think at that time, I'll have to set up my appointments for molds and to have my surgical hooks put on. My OS says it takes about 2 weeks before he usually gets the molds so. I'm thinking, to be on the safe side, I'll try to schedule those sometime around the week of June 9th. Then, what I'm not exactly sure about is whether to have the surgical hooks put on before vacation or after? My ideal plan would be to have then placed on July 8th. The OS wants to see me before surgery but, after the hooks are in. So, I was thinking I could try and see him on the 9th and then my surgery is on the 11th. Do you think that's cutting things too close to surgery time?? It's tough, because I'm away on vacation from June 28th until July 6th so there's a week there that I'm unable to use. I guess I'll figure it out.

I have a question for all of you though. Something's really weighing on me and I have to ask you all if you have experienced it too.
Lately, I find that after people find out I'm having another surgery, they look at my teeth and ask why. Now mind you, since my SARPE, my teeth really do look so much better. It really is amazing. When I smile, they look pretty good. What they can't/don't see is that I still can't bite. I have a hard time chewing so many things. I find it hard to explain to someone that doesn't deal with it on a daily basis. I try and open my mouth and bite back down, trying to show them that my teeth just don't meet. I'm sure I look like an idiot but, I try so hard to explain to them why and they still just look at me like you are going to have your jaw broken to fix that??
So, not only am I wondering if you deal with people like that but, do you ever start to doubt your decision??
My husband keeps telling me that we've come this far, we're not stopping now. I just find myself getting a little anxious lately and questioning myself. I think it was almost easier going into the SARPE, not having any idea what to expect.
Well thanks for letting me get a few things off my chest. I'll post again tomorrow after my appointment to let you know how it went. Thanks everyone!