Sorry for the absence

Things have been a bit stressful lately and I've kind of gone into shutdown mode. Remember a bit back when I said I was having trouble with my tailbone. Well, they did a colonoscopy and after a few days of anxiously awaiting the results, things ended up okay. Then, they recommended a cat scan and after the nurse told me everything looked okay, I received a call several hours later at 5:20pm saying that in fact it wasn't okay. They found a spot on my hip that had them concerned. I had to have an MRI on Saturday. So since then, I have been staying home thinking the worst. Late yesterday afternoon, I finally received word that it was benign. Thank God!! I kept thinking in my head that my surgery must have been cancelled because I had bigger issues to tackle. It's funny what your mind can do to you.
A few years back, my niece was diagnosed with leukemia, and I was so strong. I took charge and researched, and did everything I needed to do to help her beat it. When it came to the unknown for me recently, I fell apart. Too much on my plate I guess.

As far as my teeth, I'm in a triangle elastic on my right side, helping to pull my bite a little more together. He did that last Wednesday. It hurt the first few days, but now I barely notice it.

I tried to catch up on a few of the blogs and am just amazed at how well all of you are doing. Holly… you look great! Rachel… what an incredible recovery you are having.

Karen, keep your chin up, my thoughts and prayers are with you!

I'll catch up with everyone else shortly, take care everyone!!

UNBELIEVABLE NEWS!!

I have such incredible news to share, I can't even believe it myself. I had my molds done at the orthodontist's office the other day. Yesterday, at 4:45 I received a call from the Ortho's office saying that Dr. Post had to meet with me before I left for vacation. I immediately felt the anxiety creeping in. We were originally going to schedule something for today but, after telling her I was feeling a little anxious about this meeting, she said I could come in for 5:15. So off we went.
Dr. Post said that he had really studied my molds that afternoon and felt very strongly that with a little patience and the correct tweaking with elastics, he feels he can accomplish what we set out to do without the second surgery. I can't even believe I am writing this!! I knew my bite had really been coming together but, I never ever expected this news. I am so incredibly relieved. It hasn't really even hit me yet. I still can't believe it. Dr. Post laughed and said that I should tell my blog friends that we had something telepathically going on. I had been worried about the surgery and that had been thinking about how to correct it without the surgery. He actually said that over the last few months he had been wondering in the back of his head what or if he could do this without surgery. It seems like every month the open bite just got smaller and smaller with each adjustment. He says the SARPE wasn't even a question but, just that has made a big difference in my bite.

NOW, I just need to get my head around all of this new news and RELAX!! Relieved doesn't even begin to tell you how I feel right now!!

Help!!!

Alright, I'm obsessing. I can't get it off my mind. It's consuming my every thought. I'm nervous. I remember very well how much pain I was in after the SARPE. I also know he'll be doing more this time. Just the thought of him screwing plates into my jaw and then wiring me shut, makes me sick. I feel like such a wimp. I want it done, I just don't want to go through all the pain and starvation to get there.
I had my cardiology appointment last Monday. I asked him how he recommended me taking my heart medication while I am wired. He says, "are you really going to be wired, like tightly wired?" Ah, yes! So, after thinking about it he would like me to try and fit it in the space behind my molars. If I need to cut it in half, that's okay too. I'm worried that trying to shove my fingers back there to slide a pill in after my jaw was just sawed, might not feel so good. I will ask but, I am sure my regular doctor will say the same thing about my thyroid medication and my birth control. Has anyone else had any experience with this??

I want my vacation to come quickly, I need the relaxing time at the ocean with my family BUT, I am not ready for surgery. Mentally, I just don't feel there yet. It's funny, if someone asked me a month ago, I would have said lets get it done as soon as possible. Now, with 3 weeks left, I feel sick.
I don't even know where this is coming from. I actually started this post back on the 11th and haven't been able to finish and post it.

This is so hard for me to write but, I feel like I'm going crazy. I feel like every ache and pain I have must be something bad. I actually had a colonoscopy yesterday and the doctor took some biopsies. My mind has wandered off believing I must have something horrible. I feel like I need the results immediately. Has anyone ever felt so anxious about something, you find it hard to even concentrate?

I keep telling myself to relax and to breath but, I'm finding it very difficult. I haven't even been viewing my blog for fear of the inevitable.

What on earth is wrong with me? What I would give to be 6… 8 weeks post op. Help!!

Brave???

My Uncle commented to me last night that I was so brave for going ahead with this surgery. It seemed strange to me because, I certainly don't feel brave. I feel nervous. I feel like, I wish I didn't have to do it. I sat there really thinking about it. I feel like I don't really have a choice. If I want a normal bite, I have to do it. I know he meant it in the nicest way BUT, sometimes I wish people would understand that it's not just a quick decision I made so that I would look better. I would just like to be able to breath and chew like your average normal person.

34 more days.... yikes!!

Have a great weekend everyone!!

Next month...can you believe it!!!

I can officially say, my surgery is next month.
Part of me can't wait and the other part of me doesn't want it to come. You know that feeling in the pit of your stomach that you get when something big is about to happen….that's what I have going on. I'm feeling a little anxious. My youngest daughter, Kate, got a little teary eyed last night when we talked about me staying overnight in the hospital. My husband and I were talking about how poorly Holly was treated while she was there and I said, that he had better not leave me, because I don't want to go through that. So Kate asks, "if he stays with you, where will I go?" Poor thing. I told her that I would be fine and that Daddy and Grandma would make sure that one of them was always with her.

I started picking up a few things at the grocery store this weekend. I wanted to make sure I had plenty of broth in the house, to mix things with so they can go through the Zip & Squeeze bags. I got a couple of soups. I actually searched the web and came up with a few different pureed soup recipes that I would like to try so I can freeze in single portions, so that all we have to do is zap it in the microwave and pour it in the bags. Viola….dinner. Seems weird to be cooking soups this time of year. I guess a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do=)

Between softball games, a baby shower, graduation, birthdays and vacation this month, along with all of my appointments, I think it is going to fly by. I feel like I am so booked up. My girlfriends and I are trying to set up a small BBQ before I go in for surgery and it just doesn't seem to be happening.

Anyway, I hope Holly, Heather and Leah are all feeling great and back to normal in no time!! My thoughts are with all of you!!

Newest Pics

Here's the lastest

I'm feeling a little emotional today. I just feel the need to tell you all once again how amazing you are! Just when I need a boost, you all seem to come and say just the right things! Thank you!!
Does anyone ever wonder if we'll ever meet? So many of you have made such an incredible impact on my life, that I wonder sometimes if I'll ever come face to face with any of you. Hmmm… I hope so!!

Now on to Ortho. news:

I had a regular adjustment this morning. My teeth are already hurting so, whatever he did… it's working!
I told him about my thoughts on scheduling the upcoming appointments. We were both pretty much on the same page so, that made me feel better. As more and more gets scheduled, I get a little more excited and also a little more anxious. You know, the surgery part doesn't bother me at all. It's still that whole wired shut thing I can't seem to get off my mind. Breath……..

So my appointments look like this:

June 16: Blood work (lab appt.)
June 17: Surgical Molds
June 20: EKG and Pre-Op Physical
June 28 - July 5th: VACATION
July 7: Pre-Op Hospital Interview
July 9: Surgical Spurs placed
July 10: Appt. with Dr. Weldon (OS) He wanted to see me after he received the molds and after the surgical spurs were placed.
July 11: Surgery

I am thinking that with all of these appointments and with everything else I have going on, (my daughter plays softball and with the school year coming to an end) I'll bet time is going to fly by.
I'll have to post some new pics, I decided to go with the hot pink ligs today!!

I'm looking forward to a nice long 3 day weekend. My husband took the whole weekend off. We haven't had a weekend off together in a very long time. Between his work and mine, we wake up to an alarm clock 7 days a week. Not this weekend!!!!

I hope you all enjoy your weekend too!!

Another adjustment and a little self doubt

I have another adjustment tomorrow morning. I think at that time, I'll have to set up my appointments for molds and to have my surgical hooks put on. My OS says it takes about 2 weeks before he usually gets the molds so. I'm thinking, to be on the safe side, I'll try to schedule those sometime around the week of June 9th. Then, what I'm not exactly sure about is whether to have the surgical hooks put on before vacation or after? My ideal plan would be to have then placed on July 8th. The OS wants to see me before surgery but, after the hooks are in. So, I was thinking I could try and see him on the 9th and then my surgery is on the 11th. Do you think that's cutting things too close to surgery time?? It's tough, because I'm away on vacation from June 28th until July 6th so there's a week there that I'm unable to use. I guess I'll figure it out.

I have a question for all of you though. Something's really weighing on me and I have to ask you all if you have experienced it too.
Lately, I find that after people find out I'm having another surgery, they look at my teeth and ask why. Now mind you, since my SARPE, my teeth really do look so much better. It really is amazing. When I smile, they look pretty good. What they can't/don't see is that I still can't bite. I have a hard time chewing so many things. I find it hard to explain to someone that doesn't deal with it on a daily basis. I try and open my mouth and bite back down, trying to show them that my teeth just don't meet. I'm sure I look like an idiot but, I try so hard to explain to them why and they still just look at me like you are going to have your jaw broken to fix that??
So, not only am I wondering if you deal with people like that but, do you ever start to doubt your decision??
My husband keeps telling me that we've come this far, we're not stopping now. I just find myself getting a little anxious lately and questioning myself. I think it was almost easier going into the SARPE, not having any idea what to expect.
Well thanks for letting me get a few things off my chest. I'll post again tomorrow after my appointment to let you know how it went. Thanks everyone!

Another call~but wait... it's all good!

Candy from the Oral Surgeon's office called me again this morning. I saw it on the caller ID, and I immediately felt panic.
All is good though. She said she wanted to call and share a little good news with me. Finally! She said she received a call from the assisting physician's office, he IS available on July 11th. She seemed to feel that for some reason, everything is falling into place much better on this day. So, at this point in time... the 11th looks really good. I won't ever say it's a definite though!

I'm not sure if I should speak the date....

After a very long weekend and a few more phone calls today, I finally got my surgery date scheduled. As of right now, it looks like it will be... July 11th. Only 4 days later than expected, but still extremely frustrating to have to go through this!
I'm really hoping this date is a sure thing! I feel a little bit better about it because, the hospital just called me to set up my pre-op appt. already. This was actually a little strange because they actually called me before Candy at the OS's office did. So, I called her immediately and asked her if this date was a done deal because the hospital was trying to set up my pre-op. She said it definitely was, and that she just hadn't had a minute to call me yet. (I am so sure she is sick of talking to me) So my pre-op is set for July 7th at 8:30 (the same day I was supposed to have surgery, go figure)
I changed my countdown clock and we begin again!
Thank you all for standing by me!!

Spoken too soon

I just received a call (actually 3) from Candy at my Oral Surgeon's office. She tells me that she has been arguing with the hospital because, I guess on Wednesday she received a call from them telling her that the O.R. was already booked on July 7th. That another oral surgeon got his booking sheet in before them and that he needs it for 6 hours. She tells me that she argued with him and said that they have 3 other operating rooms, but he said there is nothing he could do and that his supervisor was out until Monday.
Her only other option/thought, was that we could book it on Friday the 11th (the hospital has an opening that day) and move Dr. Weldon's regular patients to Saturday morning. At this point, I don't care what they do... they need to get me in that week!! There are two of us that do loans at work and the woman I work with will be out the last week in July and the first two weeks in August. So, Friday the 11th would be the last time I could do it and have enough time afterwards to recoup before having to go back to work.
I guess I spoke too soon didn't I?
I am supposed to hear from them today to have a little bit better of an idea as to what is happening. Please give me strength!!

Hallelujah

My Insurance letter came in the mail on Friday!!! I never read the letter my Oral Surgeon sent to them but, I know it was just a matter of a few weeks ago. Harvard Pilgrim has truly been wonderful during this whole thing. It says I have been approved for:

Reconstruct Midface, Lefort

Prepare Face/Oral Prosthesis

I’m not sure in Insurance terms what exactly it means but, as long as it says the Lefort is covered, I’m good. Things seem to be moving in a positive direction lately. It feels good.

I still have moments when I get a little anxious about being wired shut. Someone posted a comment saying that while she was wired, she carried around cutters just for peace of mind. Maybe I’ll do the same thing. I know it’s all in my head; it just makes me nervous still. One reason why I think I feel this way is because I’m a mouth breather. It freaks me out a little bit to think I won’t be able to get enough air. I know, I know… all in my head.

OR… what if I have to throw up?? I remember doing this after the SARPE!!

Right now, I just can’t wait to be on the other side!

I haven’t really been watching what I eat lately. I keep telling myself that I mine as well eat while I can. I probably won’t fit into any of my summer clothes the week before surgery while I’m on vacation. lol

I have been walking a lot more lately. I want to try and be really fit and healthy when I go in this time. Maybe it will make a difference, maybe it won’t, but I figure it can’t hurt.

Work has been really good too, I was originally only planning on taking a week off just like the SARPE but, the OS said I need a minimum of two weeks. So, I won’t return until July 21^st. They’ve been letting me bank some comp. time so I won’t have to use all of my vacation time up.

I was a little surprised the Ortho. didn’t want to see me sooner, I don’t go again until May 20^th. At that time, I’ll have to set up the final appointments for molds and surgical hooks. The OS wants to see me with my new molds and hooks prior to me going on vacation.

I’m keeping my fingers crossed that everything continues to go smoothly!!

BIG NEWS!!

Last week I called the OS's office a few times (okay, maybe more than a few and I am sure they got sick of hearing from me) to see if they had decided anything. Finally, on Friday I spoke with Jamie and she told me that Dr. Weldon would like to see me on Monday at 12:30. He was meeting with Dr. Post over the weekend and looking at my molds. I was so anxious all weekend wondering what he would say.
I guess the plan was for him to look at my bite, do some measurements, make a determination about exactly what would need to be done and then decide if he could do it on the 7th on his own or push it out until August and have an assisting physician available.
Well, before we left, he stated that it was a pretty straight forward surgery, similar cuts that were made for the SARPE. He said it would be a 1 piece Lefort, he will lower the maxilla and shave some of the bone above it and then try and replace it with plates and screws Jaime, his assistant, said that this is my "big surgery." He also said that he was very comfortable doing it on his own!
So… July 7th is still the day!

BUT… now we get to the scary part…
I might have to be wired shut... for 2 to 6 weeks! OMG! I'm already having a panic attack just thinking about it. My immediate response was, you didn't have to do that after my SARPE, why this time? His response was that during the SARPE he wasn't trying to match up my top jaw with my bottom one. He said that if I remembered correctly, during the SARPE, after he made the cuts, my maxilla just fell. He had to put these wires up through my maxilla to keep it stable. He says that I have very thin bones and he wants to make certain that everything heals properly. Also, because of my thin bone issue, ww don't know how well the plates and screws will hold so, keeping me wired while everything heals will help everything stay where it needs to.
So….. all of you wired people… I need to hear from you!! Just the thought makes me feel claustrophobic.
He said he may or may not keep the splint in. He'll use one to line things up but, he'll determine during surgery whether to keep it in or not.
He also said that I would be in ICU for 1 maybe 2 days. That freaks me out a little bit too. I'm excited things are moving forward yet a little scared too.
Now's the time for me to get really healthy. I've been fighting off that cold so many of you are talking about since last Thursday. It just doesn't seem to want to go away.

So, 10 1/2 weeks until vacation and 11 1/2 weeks until surgery, I can do this! The cottage we are renting in Maine sleeps 10 people. My husband and I and our 2 girls will go up on June 28th and spend until Thursday alone and then on Thursday some of my family will join us so we can celebrate July 4th with all of them, right on the beach. They will stay 2 nights. All of us have never been away together. It should be hectic but fun. I'm sure it will help keep my mind off my surgery, at that time, it will only be days away.

The real countdown begins… I hope I end up having some surgery buddies!!

This is "Pal"

The first one is on the ride home. He was checking everything out for about the first half hour and then he slept the rest of the way (1 1/2 hours). When we got home, he ate, checked the place out and then fell back to sleep in Kate's arms. He had a long day!

No confirmed date yet

Okay, so I talked to Candy a couple more times and Mary at the Ortho's office (who actually seemed a little annoyed with me) and this is what I've been told. Dr. Weldon (the OS) wants to see the latest molds so he can decide how in depth the surgery will be. If he feels it is something he can do on his own without an assisting physician, then he'll go ahead and keep it scheduled on July 7th. If he feels he really needs him then, we'll have to pick a new date. So, it's the hurry up and wait game right now. Candy left on vacation for a week today so, I'm hoping I don't get lost in the shuffle over there… I just feel like I deserve an answer on this, ASAP!

On a happier note, things have warmed up a little and our new kitten was able to board his flight this morning. We are hoping to have him in our possession by 3:00 today… fingers crossed! If everything goes well, I'll post a picture of the little guy.

Hopefully the next time I write, it will be with good news all around!

This can't be happening!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I called the OS's office this morning to see if they received the "go ahead" letter from my Ins. Co. yet and Candy tells me that Jaime is busy but, she'll look in my file to see where we were at. She then proceeds to tell me, that a call has been put into the Ortho. to see if we can do the surgery on June 23rd. Are you f***ing kidding me???? I then tried to calmly explain to her that I leave to go on vacation from June 28th - July 5th…the vacation I planned so early on in the summer because, THEY scheduled my surgery for the 7th! She said that the assisting physician that Dr. Weldon likes to work with is unavailable for July 7th. Wonder when they were going to tell me?
So, she said she would get back to me after she spoke to Jaime. Then I get a message (I stepped out of my office for a minute) stating that the 14th, and the 21st weren't any good either.

I called her back and just as I start to speak, I start crying. I try to explain to her that this is my life they are screwing with and that maybe I need to speak to the doctor. I tried to tell her that my "summer vacation" deposit for my cottage was sent already and scheduled around this date they gave me, that the following week was scheduled at work for me to be out, that my mother also took the week off to help out, that my physical and EKG were already scheduled. She apologized and I understand it's not her fault but, I would think that as soon as they found out about this, they should have called me immediately! I find it funny that I only found out after I called them.
So… she said she would call back again after she spoke with the doctor. I'm sure at this point there is nothing they can do. I just don't understand why I can't seem to get this surgery set in stone.

I'm sure one of the reasons I was so upset was because, we had been looking for a particular kitten for quite a while. (we have 1 already and love the breed) So, right before Christmas I found a lady in Nova Scotia that was going to be having a litter in January. So, after they were born, she forwarded pictures and we picked out our new kitten. It would be ready to go March 17th. So, we started planning a trip to go get him but, found out that the ferry we would catch in Portland, Maine doesn't start running again until May. So then we decided to buy him a plane ticket. Then, we were told that they don't allow "live cargo" on board until April 1st. Not a huge deal, so the breeder booked his flight for the 1st. We were all set to leave for the airport yesterday afternoon and I get an e-mail from her saying that she was missing one piece of paperwork for customs and that they wouldn't let her board him. So, they schedule him for a flight this morning. So this morning, we get up at 5:00am to head to the airport, which is 2 hours away, and I get another call from her. The airline thought it was a little cold this morning for him to fly so… we had to turn around AGAIN. We're now shooting for Friday morning. I'm tired and grumpy and can't for the life of me figure out why everything seems so difficult for me right now. I know it's not all life altering stuff I am complaining about, and I am very lucky to have a wonderful healthy husband and great healthy kids. I'm just getting discouraged. I have been doing really well lately keeping my chin up. But man…how much can a girl take.
Sorry for my ranting and my language above, I just needed to get this off my chest! I'll keep you all posted. I keep thinking that maybe this 2nd surgery isn't in the cards for me.

More progress!!!

Okay, I went to see the Ortho. this afternoon to get my wires removed for my cleaning and to fix my TPA problem. (see last post) So, when I arrived, Dr. Post immediately came over to remove my wires. Then he said he had to remove the back left band and solder a part on a new one for the TPA to fit in. OUCH, that band did not want to come out. As he was twisting and yanking, I kept thinking… is my tooth coming out with it??? Next he removed the bottom wire and while doing so, he popped off a bracket. So he had Heather come over and put the new band back on and had her prep the tooth to replace the bracket.

Next, I went off to my cleaning. She said I was the third adult in braces for her today. I find this so weird because I very rarely run into any adults in braces. Wish I would though. Anyways, she said I was doing a great job with my cleaning. That made me feel really good because I do try.

Now, back at the Ortho. office, Dr. Post tweaks my wires before he puts them back in. This surprised me because I was only there a few weeks ago. I’m in favor of any tweaking though. Then, he starts to put my TPA back in and the part he just soldered on breaks off again. He says “you win, we’ll keep it out.” WOOO HOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! He says that the wire on top is so strong, it should prevent anything from relapsing. I am so happy, it feels incredible to be able to feel the full rounded roof of my mouth. I definitely feel like I speak more clearly without it too.

I’m going to try and post a pic I fiddled with in paint. I’m not great at all of this stuff but, I was hoping to point out to you the things that still bother me. My midlines are off a little and I still have that tiny triangle gap in between my two front teeth but, the thing that bothers me most is the “open bite” on either side of my front teeth. I know my open bite has closed considerably but I can’t figure out how he’ll close the openings on either side. Maybe the surgery will correct this.

Dr. Post also told me that he spoke with Dr. Weldon’s office and that July 7^th is a definite! The countdown begins. Right now, it seems like a long time away but, I’ll bet it will be here before I know it. It’s time to get healthy and start exercising regularly! Hopefully everything is still a GO with the Ins. Co.

POP

So, about 6:00 last night, I was eating dinner and POP, the inside bracket that holds my TPA on the left side broke off. It was poking me a bit so I decided to call and see if I should do anything. The answering machine gives Dr. Posts number and one of the Tech's, Deb. I decided to give Deb a call to see what she thought. I ended up meeting her at the Ortho's office at 7:00pm (thank you Deb!!!) and she ended up just taking the TPA out for the night. I have appt.'s to go in today to have my wires removed and replaced for my cleaning this afternoon. Deb said after the cleaning, she would just stay late and get a new band put back on so the TPA can be replaced.
Last night though, felt wonderful!! It has been 10 very long months with something on the roof of my mouth. I feel like I speak more clearly already. I would love for him to say it can stay out but, I know he's not going to. I'll post a couple of pics tonight after I get out of work. For the first time in a while now, I'm starting to really like the results I'm seeing.

Happy Easter

I wanted to wish you all a Happy Easter!!

I am sure this is what the Easter Bunny will be bringing me...

Staying Positive

Okay, I’m trying to get out of the rut I’m in and look at things in a more positive light. I feel good and I’m trying to think positively about my next appointment with the doctor. I’m sure everything will work out just fine.

When I was at my last Ortho. appointment, Dr. Post told me he would be contacting the Oral Surgeon and that I should do the same. He said we could schedule something in either July or August. So I called and spoke with Jamie, she said that July 7th works well for them. I wasn’t at first, overly thrilled with this date but, I’ll work with it. Now I’m trying to work vacation into the week prior to this so my family and I can have a nice relaxing time together before the big day. This could be tough though, being the 4th of July week and all. Hopefully all of the homes/cottages in Maine aren’t all booked that week already.
I’m trying to relax and not etch this date in stone yet. After what happened, I don’t want to get too disappointed if it doesn’t work out. Hopefully all goes well with the Ins. Co.

I have to post some more pictures soon. I can’t believe the changes that are still happening. My open bite has closed significantly. When I slide my bottom jaw forward a tiny bit, I can actually touch my top and bottom teeth. I have never in my life been able to do that before. It’s so exciting!

Next Thursday is the big cleaning day! Woo Hoo! It’s so time consuming though. To the Ortho. to have the wires removed, to the dentist for the cleaning, then back to the Ortho. to have the wires replaced… there goes your afternoon. My husband and youngest daughter also have cleanings the same afternoon. It’ll be a family affair.

Thanks fellow Ortho. bloggers for your positive words when I needed them most!

More bad news

So things haven't gotten much better for me lately but, I am trying really hard to keep my chin up.

I went to the Ortho yesterday, for a scheduled adjustment. He looked around in there for a while, changed the bottom wire, tweaked the top one and then took out my TPA. Oh, it felt so good but, then he put it back in. He wants to create a little more room. Not sure why we didn't do it while the expander was in?? Who knows. The worst part of the appointment was that he said he spoke with my O.S.'s office again. He strongly feels that the surgery should be scheduled for July or August. How discouraging! I was really hoping for this to be behind me BEFORE summer. He wants me back in 4 weeks to change my lower wire again.

On an unrelated issue, I've been dealing with other health issues lately. I was diagnosed with Graves Disease back in 2000. This means I was hyperthyroid. After trying to fix it for a few years without luck, they gave me some radio-active iodine to basically kill my thyroid. Now I take a thyroid medication everyday and things have been going pretty well over the last few years. When you are hyperthyroid, everything in your body speeds up, when you go hypothyroid, it slows everything down. So, we've noticed over the years that every time my thyroid goes too low, my heart beats a little funky. They actually call it a minor prolonged QT. My heart doesn't shock itself to start beating again, quickly enough and I guess it has gotten worse all of a sudden. It's actually all very confusing. Anyway, to try and correct this issue, my thyroid medicine has been upped and I have to take a small dose of a beta-blocker and then get rechecked again in 4 weeks. I'm crossing my fingers, all goes well. It's weighing on me heavily! It sounds ridiculous, but one of my first questions to the doctor was if this was going to have any effect on my upcoming surgery plans. He didn't think so. I'm praying that the Ins. Co. doesn't try to change their mind and say I'm a risk now. I truly believe your not given more than you can handle… but lately I'm feeling pretty overwhelmed. I need a break from all this negative news!

Thanks everyone for all of your wonderful comments and support. Some days are just tougher than others, I know you all know what I mean.
So, we have yet another snowstorm coming our way, I don't think spring will ever come. We have so much snow, I'm sure it will take till May to have it all melt. I keep telling myself that all of the shoveling is such good exercise (I have to get something positive out of it).

I have had a cleaning appointment scheduled for March 27th for a while now, I have held off canceling it just in case "something" came up with my surgery date. Good thing. At least something to look forward to. It's pretty pathetic when your looking forward to a teeth cleaning appt, huh?
I called the Ortho's office yesterday morning just to ask if they had latex free ligs. The secretary wasn't sure, but said she would have somebody call me back. Still haven't heard anything. At least I put a bug in their ears though.
Not much new to report about my teeth. I think I'll post another picture soon. Maybe comparing it to my last ones might make me feel like something small might be happening. He did put a heavy duty square wire in last time.
The small gap between my two front teeth still bugs me. I'm constantly putting my tongue up there and sucking any spit or drink that sits there. I know, it sounds gross I think it's a habit now. I'll have to try and be aware of when I'm doing it so I can try to stop.

Keep Smiling everyone!

Just another day...

It's been a few days, and I'm trying really hard to think positive. As disappointed as I am, how I feel is not going to change anything. I need to march forward and hope for the best. Thank you, for all the support you have sent my way:)

If you have been reading my blog for a little while, you will know that I have had a really hard time with my lips. They are still quite sore most of the time and after an adjustment, they get incredibly swollen and really hurt for several days after. During the really difficult weeks, I use the hydrocortisone ointment that the dermatologist recommended. It helps, but only briefly. So, I decided to try and research this a little more. Just recently, someone posted a message on Archwired, saying that they thought they were allergic to the archwire or the ligs because of swelling. Then, a few other people posted similar issues. The consensus seemed to be that it may be an allergic reaction to the elastic ligs. Now, I have never known I was allergic to latex before, but maybe my body has decided it doesn't like it anymore. I'm guessing now, when you go to the doctors, I'll bet most places use latex free. So, I'm going to check with the Ortho. First, to see if he uses latex free gloves and also to see if he has any latex free ligs. I hope he does just so I can see if this is the problem. If it isn't, I may just have to deal with the fact that the metal in the wires is the culprit. I'd like to be able to rule out the latex first though.

On another note, something else has been bothering me too. I wonder if anyone else feels the same way? I started this blog, and it has helped me immensely. The friends I have made and the support group we have, is invaluable. What bothers me though, is that I have told my family and friends all about it, I told them I write down what's going on, post pictures… and do you think they would ever go to it?? No! Just once I would like to be surprised by a message from them. I just don't understand why something that means so much to me, means nothing to them. Maybe this whole orthodontic journey has consumed me and they are sick of hearing about it. I just don't know! At least I have you guys! Thanks for letting me vent today:) I feel better already!

It's Official...

My surgery has been postponed.

I can’t even begin to tell you how I feel right now. I’m at such a loss. I feel like the floor has just been pulled from underneath me. I know it’s not the end of the world… it just plain stinks though. I called the Oral Surgeon’s office hoping to get some information and he wasn’t in today so, I called my Orthodontist. His secretary said that it showed on the “screen” that my surgery had been canceled and that I had been notified this morning. Uh, it wasn’t me that was notified. She then transferred me to him.

So, he says that my bite was so bad, that he wants to get it as close as he can before surgery and he feels after looking at the new molds, I’m not there yet. I was very pleasant and told him I understood. What I really wanted to do was cry and plead my case. How can he do this? How can we be so close and then have it all left with no plan in mind? I’m crushed.

Only time will tell

It just hasn't been a good day.

I went to my appointment this morning and had the new bands put on, x-rays, molds, wax bite and the newest adjustment. My teeth and jaw are killing me. It's weird, after every adjustment, my lips get very swollen and really, really red. I must be allergic to something going on in there. So after all of that, he said he would look at the molds and get them over to the OS's office right away. He also had me schedule a date for my surgical hooks on March 12th. Aside from being sore, I left there feeling pretty good.
Now, comes the bad news…
My husband brought my daughter to her appointment this afternoon. While waiting for her adjustment, Dr. Post mentioned to him, that he is concerned that the cart got before the horse and is not so sure I'm ready for surgery. He says he is meeting with Dr. Weldon tonight to discuss my case.
I'm just at a loss for words! I wish they had communicated this before I was given a date and gotten my hopes up. I have scheduled everything already, the physical, the pre-op at the hospital, my vacation at work. Now it looks like I might be canceling all of it. So, both offices are closed on Friday, my guess is I won't be getting any information before next week sometime. Lucky me!
I know I need to be patient and make sure everything is aligned properly before the surgery, I'm just terribly disappointed.
I'll let you all know as soon as I hear something.

Happy Valentine's Day everyone:)

Another day, another delay

I just feel so down lately. I want to get some concrete news so I have something to plan for. I am such a planner. It helps on vacations, but not a good thing for this journey!
I was all set to have my adjustment, molds and x-rays this morning BUT, due to this delightful weather we are having up here in New England, it's a no go for today. They said I could come in tomorrow at 9:45 instead. I know it's only a day, but I feel like everything seems to be falling out of place orthodontics wise.
The OS office just called and said the Insurance company really needs copies of my molds and x-rays. I'm trying! With my luck, the Ortho. will give me the go ahead and then the Ins. Co. will hold me up. UGGGHHHH!!! It's just a bad day. I'm tired and I'm sick of snow and ice!!! Come on Spring!
I'll post again tomorrow after my appointment, hopefully!!

WHAT??!!??

I went to the orthodontists office today, to have the spacers put in between my lower back bottom molars. While I was there, I asked Dr. Post, if Dr Weldon the oral surgeon, contacted him about my upcoming surgery date. He said, NO. What?!?! No?? His office told me that they contacted him. UGH!!!! I’m scheduled next Wednesday to have the back bands put on, new x-rays and molds. Then, he said he’ll decide if I’m ready for surgery. You have to be kidding me! Then he’ll decide?? I already have my life planned…
He did ask when would be good for me. I told him March 24th works. I want this so bad. I want to be healed enough to go away on a nice vacation this summer without having to worry about eating, or lack of eating. Last summer was ruined by my last surgery. I mean, not ruined. I wanted it done, it’s just that I really wanted to plan a nice vacation and have this final surgery out of the way. The braces I can deal with, it’s the surgery looming over my head that I can’t stand.

I am going to be a wreck until I find out what he decides! I feel like crying.

I HAVE A DATE!!!!!

I received two phone calls this morning, both from my OS's office. One was Candy, she does the Ins. processing. She said she has notes back from May stating that when we were ready for the next surgery, to just submit the information. So she thinks everything will go through just fine. The other one was from Dr. Weldon's nurse/scheduler, Jamie. She actually went in on my last surgery. She says that barring any problems with the Ins. Company, she has submitted all the paperwork to the hospital for my next surgery to be on…… drum roll please……..
MARCH 24TH!!!!
That's only 8 weeks away! I'm so excited and a little bit nervous too. I ordered the zip and squeeze stuff last week just in case. I want to start getting a game plan ready. Vitamins, exercise. I want my body to be as ready as possible this time around.

New pics, including the profile

I thought I would share that dreaded profile pic. Do you see what I mean though? You could almost see where a lower advancement might work. Who knows though, I'll just leave it to the professionals.

I am amazed at how much the openbite has closed. I remember after the SARPE I could fit a whole finger into the opening. The braces have definately been doing a good job. Because of the shape of my teeth though, I don't think the braces can do anything more with the little gap in between my two front teeth. I will definately need to get that fixed, for some reason it really bothers me. I can't wait for that moment after my next surgery when I can look in the mirror and see my teeth touch for the first time ever in my life. I know exactly what Shontell means when she says she got choked up at her appointment. This has been an amazing transformation. I wonder if our doctors even know what a difference they have made in our lives.

This is going to be an awesome year.

OS Update!!

I am trying not to get too excited about my appointment today. I feel like everything went so well though. He addressed my concerns that I spoke of earlier. None of which, he seemed to think were very serious. He thinks the roof of my mouth may just be from the way my bone healed after surgery. It’s really very minor and doesn’t really bother me terribly, I feel at ease with that answer and happy that something wasn’t wrong.
He thinks the clicking in my jaw is just part of my jaw problems that will hopefully be fixed with my next surgery. He was actually really pleased with the results already. When I first went to see him, when I opened my mouth, my jaw popped horribly. It’s significantly better than it was. In time, hopefully it will be fixed.
My lips… he can’t think of anything the surgery would have done to them. He said he really just thinks it’s the braces. My lips don’t close naturally, it’s definitely forced. So between that and the rubbing of the braces, he just thinks they are constantly irritated.

Ok… now for the surgery part. He said he really is pleased with the way my teeth are coming together. He still feels that upper jaw surgery is still the best choice for me. I mentioned to him that Dr. Post had mentioned a few adjustments back, a possible lower advancement. He said in his opinion, he would prefer just doing the upper jaw surgery. He said he feels we can get at least a 95%+ bite with just doing the upper jaw. He feels if you can get that close, its best not to do more if it isn’t necessary. I have thought a lot lately about how I would feel if he said this. I think I am really okay with it. I think being able to just have the one jaw done and being that close is okay with me. I have thought a lot about the complications and lingering problems you can have after lower jaw surgery so I guess, if I don’t have to chance it, I won’t. Maybe I’m just chicken to press the issue, but I really feel comfortable with this decision.

I left his office at about 4:45 and he said he was still planning to speak with the Ortho. tonight. He said he would get his staff to resubmit the Ins. paperwork to make sure we are all set there. So, before I left, he said we could tentatively look at March for a surgery date. I immediately felt the butterflies and the excitement. His practice though, is incredibly busy so, I’m not going to hold my breath until we have a definite date.

He said the cuts for the surgery are very similar to the ones he made for my SARPE. He said it’s a little more involved, but he suspects I won’t be in the hospital for more than a night or two. He said I did really well with my SARPE so it would probably just be the one night. I have to cover for somebody’s vacation at work for one week in March, but other than that, everything could potentially work out okay.

My mind is running a mile a minute. I am praying that everything just falls into place.

OS Appt. tomorrow

So my appointment with the Oral Surgeon is tomorrow. I'm so worried I am going to be disappointed. I hope he at least gets the ball rolling with the Insurance company again. When he sent the request into the Ins. Co. for my SARPE, he detailed the whole game plan including my second surgery. They approved the first one so I'm hoping we won't have any trouble this time around.
I have three major concerns I want to address with him:

1. I've noticed that I have a small bump with a groove type line on the right hand side on the roof of my mouth. Sometimes lately, I notice it gets a little sore and I feel a throbbing pain.

2. When I walk, I notice that on the left side of my jaw, I have this clicking noise. I have no idea what it is, but it drives me crazy.

3. My lips!!! They still bother me so much. They burn and hurt so badly. I use the hydrocortizone way more than the dermotologist recommended. It's the only thing that seems to help though.

So... wish me luck tomorrow and I'll keep you posted.

A surprise adjustment!!

I brought my daughter to her Ortho. appt. yesterday and low and behold, he said he could do my adjustment too. I reminded him I had an appt. with the OS next Thursday. I told him I was hoping for a surgery date of sometime no later than May, earlier if possible. He actually seemed like that wasn't out of the question. So, I have two more appt.'s coming up soon. When he originally put my bottom braces on, he didn't band my last molars. He said they looked good and didn't want them banded while he moved everything else around. Well, he wants them on now. So on the 13th I'll go to have separators put in (oh, how I hate those things) and then on the 20th I'll have bands put on and then he said he wanted me to get some new molds made up. I really hope this means we're close.
In the beginning, when I had my first surgery, changes seemed to come quick. Now, I feel like it's always a hurry up and wait deal. I know good things will come in time, I just want to see something now. I'm so happy for the people that finally have their dates scheduled. A little jealous too I guess.

I just took some Advil, my head and jaw are aching today. It goes right along with my mood. The holidays kept me so busy, I didn't have time to think about the next step. Then, my sister and niece came to visit from Texas and North Carolina. My sister left yesterday. Now it's time for me to get busy with something else… I'd like it to be preparing for surgery.
Hopefully, I'll hear some really good news next Thursday.